Emotions: The opportunity to avoid conflicts?

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Emotions: The opportunity to avoid conflicts?

In the last article I wrote about self-care and how important it is to live your own world as a parent to have energy for the world of others around you. Also as a role model not to hide or even suppress your own feelings. Children notice this quickly and often think they are to blame. Therefore it is important to explain yourself and speak up for your feelings early on, also to avoid bursting in the wrong place.

If only it were that simple, "Explain myself and speak for my feelings". Do I even know what I should explain and what I feel? And if so, do I allow myself my feelings and ultimately accept them? Because only then can I also speak for them. The answer is, I have to become aware of myself. But how? My girlfriend recently told me that her son, when he does sports, always approaches it with full fervor and has the professionals as a role model. In soccer it's Manuel Neuer, in skating it's Mr. XY. He always says "I want to be like...", grabs his soccer ball or skateboard and is off through the door. She told him why it always had to be the best, why not lower the bar? They started to argue about it and her son accused her of "Stop ruining everything for me”.

I asked her what she was afraid of? She said that he would be disappointed not to be able to reach his role models. What is happening here?

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Self-Care...why is it so important?

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Self-Care...why is it so important?

A homage to motherhood…

I like to compare motherhood to the juggler in the circus who tries to hold all the plates on the sticks at the same time...so it often feels like doing justice to all our roles, the mother role, the business role, the partner role, the girlfriend role, the daughter role, etc., just to name a few. All of these roles are involved in keeping the Career, Family and Friends organization going, which begins and ends with all the appointments for family members and yourself.

Yourself...there was something? We all know the point where you think, who am I actually? Since the structure of the professional and private system consumes infinite energy. At the end of the day you just fall into bed hoping everyone will sleep through the night.

What can you do to fulfil your own roles with élan and fun?

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The family system needs structure, why is this so important?

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The family system needs structure, why is this so important?

The world of many children is structured according to the fact that the parents are either in the office or at home. Not being in the office usually means having time for them. Now, during quarantine periods, many parents are in the home office and for many children this automatically means - time for me. As we also know, children are very demanding in their needs. They do this until they get an answer. Therefore it is important to explain yourself to children, the biggest underestimation is that children do not understand it yet, they understand much more and much earlier than we think. Explain the situation and, depending on the child's age, use aids, visualise, draw clocks on when time is available again and distinguish themselves by rooms and time windows.

Why is it so hard to set bounderies and say no?

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What emotions - in times of quarantine - arise in the family?

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What emotions - in times of quarantine - arise in the family?

I receive many letters in which you describe the ups and downs you are going through during the time of the quarantine. One day things are going well and one can take a positive view of the situation, the next day the sensations suddenly turn upside down, emotions boil over and conflicts arise, within oneself and among each other.

Why are these fluctuations? We have little control over the situation right now and we always try to take the control we can. At this time it is difficult, because we are led by experts and politicians. Our parts, such as solidarity, reason, intellect, make it easier to deal with it, again our scepticism, understanding, question things. This inner process of weighing up is important, but in extreme situations like this, it costs a lot of energy.

What do we have influence on at the moment and can we gain some control?

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The time in quarantine - a big challenge

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The time in quarantine - a big challenge

I would like to use this blog to keep in touch with you, my clients, in order to accompany you as we continue to balance ourselves with the tools of self-leadership in times of the Corona crisis, which demands a lot from us. I also want to use this block to teach you, who are not yet familiar with the model, the Self-Leadership Tools step by step, so that times like these are easier to manage. Whether it is about the dynamics in the office with team, colleagues and superiors or a new dynamic in quarantine with the whole family, self-leadership is needed in both areas, namely "how do I manage myself" and "what is the resulting handling of my environment?

Now is the time to understand more in order to get through the crisis well.

I read a great interview with the psychologist Gerd Gigerenzer about the current corona situation and would like to quote the following from him: It is important in such situations to keep a clear head. Now is the time to understand more in order to get through the crisis well. That hits the nail on the head. It is not only about understanding the situation of the crisis and the disease, but also about understanding oneself (self-leadership) in the dynamics of quarantine. This alone gives strength and new energy to master the special circumstances.

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